Chiseled abs? Check. Breakdancing talent? Check. History as a male stripper? Check. For these reasons, and many more, People Magazine named actor Channing Tatum as 2012's Sexiest Man Alive.
There is no doubt that Tatum has been knighted with the honor as a result of his summer flick, Magic Mike. Playing the puzzling role of unbearably-attractive-male-stripper-and-custom-furniture-entrepreneur, Tatum's shirtless-and even bottomless-scenes were captivating enough for most audience members to ignore the fact that the film's plot was far below par. Sure, he may be 32, but Tatum proves sexy isn't all about the numbers.
And it's not just his looks that contribute to his sex appeal. More than that, he's modest. Upon finding out that he was given People's honor, "My first thought was, 'Y'all are messing with me,'" Tatum told the magazine.
Unfortunately, ladies and gents, the "amazingly beautiful" actor (in my roommate's own words) is taken; Tatum married his Step Up costar, Jenna Dewan-Tatum, back in 2009, and the pair has been almost disgustingly inseparable since ("They're married? That's amazing!"). But don't lose all hope-there are still plenty of men who are unattached and undeniably sexy. So, without further ado, I provide you with a few alternative options for 2012's Sexiest Man Alive.
The Brandeis student population may be in their late teens or early 20s, but that doesn't mean we can't appreciate older men. Case in point: Gerard Butler. He may not have the smooth moves of Tatum and has taken a temporary hiatus from the big screen, but the 43-year-old can still walk the red carpet and captivate the attention of every female within a two-mile radius.
Maybe 43 is a little old for you. Is 34 a little better? If that's a yes, then maybe you'd consider Psy, a South Korean singer/rapper/music producer who has literally taken the world by storm with his hit, "Gangnam Style." He also has quite the sense of humor-have you seen the song's music video?!
Or maybe you don't really care what your sexy man sounds like-you just want him to look good. Might I suggest contender three: Ryan Lochte. If you're okay accepting the fact that he currently only accepts girls on a one night stand basis, this guy's for you. He's raked in seven individual Olympic medals during this summer's Games and let's be real, he has a body that doesn't look half bad in a swim suit.
But fine. To appease the cradle-robbers out there who also happen to enjoy a boy with a British accent, I provide you with five options, known to most as One Direction. Sure, the five guys have a wholesome image, (short of some incredibly suggestive lyrics in their new single, "Live While We're Young") so sexy might be a bit of an ambitious adjective, but maybe give them a little while to mature some more?
   Maybe you don't appreciate my options (I mean, personally I'd stick with Joseph Gordon-Levitt). All I'm saying is there's more to sexy men than Channing Tatum-if you can believe it.
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