Hello — Our names are Max Klein and Aaron Klein, and we are writing a column on restaurants around town. While the column may be satirical, our reviews are absolutely not. Please enjoy.

Klein: Good morning, Klein, and welcome to the first-ever Klein: Unrelated. 

Klein: So for our new readers — I guess all of our readers — what exactly will we be doing here? 

Klein: I’m so glad you asked! Seeing as we are two guys with the last name Klein that happen to be unrelated to each other, it only makes sense that we start a food review section dedicated to local restaurants. 

Klein: Yes, it’s very nice to be here. For our first-ever review, we’ll be discussing Prime Deli. 

Klein: Right, so let’s get into it. What were your immediate thoughts when you walked in? 

Klein: The selection is incredible. It seems like they have everything you could want from sandwiches to calzones to subs to…. other types of sandwiches and everything in between. 

Klein: Agreed — they really love their sandwiches. Also, the connection between Prime Deli and Brandeis is remarkable; the back wall is filled with various Brandeis clubs’ shirts. 

Klein: Okay, now to the food. You got the cheese pizza, right? 

Klein: Yeah, although, admittedly, this was a rookie move. I’ve heard great things about the calzones and the club sandwiches, and I definitely wish I had the foresight to order one of those instead. 

Klein: Yeah, that didn’t seem like the best move. How was it? 

Klein: Actually, decent. I was expecting something pretty bad given its customer base being college students, but I was pleasantly surprised. The crust was nice and crunchy, and it was generally just a good pizza. 

Klein: I’m glad your decision paid off. I got the Turkey Breast Classic, and I thought it was a very solid option. With a hearty serving of turkey, and a healthy portion of fries as well, I left very satisfied. 

Klein: Yeah it’s a good bang for your buck option, and just what you would expect from an above-average college eatery. 

Klein: Mr. Klein, that’s what I’ve heard, and I couldn’t agree more. 

Klein: Don’t call me Mr. Klein — that’s my father’s name. 

Klein: Ah, my sincerest apologies. Send him my regards! 

Klein: Will do. Toodle-oo! 

Klein: See ya later!